The Daily Challenge of Chore Distribution
In the majority of French households, the burden of household chores rests disproportionately on a single family member, often the mother. According to a study by INSEE, women spend an average of 3 hours and 26 minutes per day on domestic tasks, compared to 2 hours for men. This silent inequality generates frustration, resentment, and tensions that can undermine family harmony in the long term.
The good news? With a structured approach and the right tools, it is entirely possible to establish a fair distribution that satisfies all family members, including children.
Step 1: Take a Complete Inventory of Tasks
Before distributing anything, you first need to visualize all the invisible work. Gather the whole family and list together all the household tasks:
Daily Tasks
- Prepare meals (breakfast, lunch, dinner)
- Do the dishes or load/unload the dishwasher
- Clear and clean the table
- Tidy common areas
- Take out the trash
Weekly Tasks
- Vacuum
- Clean floors
- Do laundry and hang clothes to dry
- Iron
- Clean the bathroom
- Grocery shopping
Monthly or Occasional Tasks
- Deep cleaning
- Wash windows
- Organize closets
- Garden maintenance
This exercise is often eye-opening: many tasks are performed automatically by a single person, without the rest of the family being aware of it.
Step 2: Assign Points Based on Difficulty
Not all tasks are equal. Washing 3 plates is not comparable to cleaning the entire bathroom. The point system allows you to objectively quantify everyone's effort.
Here's an example scale:
- 5 points: Clear the table, take out the trash
- 10 points: Do the dishes, tidy the living room
- 15 points: Vacuum, do a complete load of laundry
- 20 points: Prepare a meal, clean the bathroom
- 30 points: Complete kitchen cleaning, major housework
The Economic Balance of Points
Points should reflect the real difficulty perceived by your family. Observe behaviors:
- No one wants to do a task? The points are too low. Increase them! If "Clean the toilets" at 10 points doesn't attract anyone, raise it to 20 or 25 points.
- Everyone is fighting over a task? The points are too high. Lower them! If "Water the plants" at 15 points creates disputes, reduce to 5 points.
It's the law of supply and demand applied to chores. The natural balance is created when points reflect the true perceived value of each task.
Step 3: The Debt/Credit System Explained
The fundamental principle is simple: the sum of all members' points always equals zero. When someone completes a task, they earn points, and the other members involved lose points proportionally.
Concrete Example
Imagine a family of 4 people: Dad, Mom, Lea (14 years old), and Tom (8 years old). Dad prepares dinner (20 points).
If the whole family is involved:
- Dad earns: 20 - (20÷4) = +15 points
- Mom, Lea, and Tom each lose: -5 points
- Total: +15 - 5 - 5 - 5 = 0 ✓
Step 4: Adjust Involved Members
This is where the system becomes truly intelligent. Not all tasks involve all family members in the same way.
The Children's Example
Tom, 8 years old, cannot reasonably be held responsible for "Prepare dinner". This task therefore does not involve him. However, "Clear the table" involves him perfectly!
With FairChore, you can select the involved members for each task:
- "Prepare dinner" → involves Dad, Mom, and Lea (not Tom)
- "Clear the table" → involves everyone, including Tom
- "Clean Tom's room" → involves only Tom
Result: when Dad cooks, Tom doesn't lose points (he's not involved). But when Tom clears the table, he earns points and everyone (including his parents) loses them. Fair and motivating!
Automatic Memorization
No need to reselect members each time. FairChore automatically remembers your preferences: the next time Dad records "Prepare dinner", the right members will already be preselected.
Step 5: Involve Children According to Their Age
Children who participate in household chores develop autonomy, sense of responsibility, and self-esteem. Here's how to involve them progressively:
- 3-5 years: Put away toys, put dirty laundry in the basket
- 6-8 years: Set and clear the table, help fold laundry
- 9-12 years: Vacuum, load the dishwasher, take out the trash
- Teenagers: Prepare simple meals, do their own laundry, clean the bathroom
With the point system, children see their contribution concretely and are motivated to participate more.
The Benefits of Fair Distribution
- Less tension: No more reproaches and silent resentment
- Shared mental load: Everyone knows what they need to do
- Responsible children: They learn to live in a community
- Free time for everyone: More quality family time
- Egalitarian model: You pass on values of fairness to your children
Conclusion: Take Action
Fair distribution of household chores is not an unattainable ideal. With a clear method and a suitable tool like FairChore, every family can transform this source of conflict into an opportunity for collaboration.
Start today: create your family group, invite all members, and let the point system do its work. Within a few weeks, you'll see a significant improvement in family harmony.
