Household chores list: the short answer
A household chores list that actually helps is made by the two of you, not by one person alone. Sort it by room and by frequency; add the invisible tasks, the ones that are about keeping track, planning and anticipating; give each task a value; and only then, split the chores.
The order matters. Many couples start at the end: “you do the dishes, I’ll do the laundry”, without ever having laid out everything that needs doing at home. The split is then based on what each of you sees, and you don’t both see the same things. The list below is a starting point: go through it together, cross out what doesn’t apply to you, add what’s missing.
- Step 1: make the list together.
- Step 2: sort it by room and by frequency.
- Step 3: add the invisible tasks.
- Step 4: give each task a value.
- Step 5: split the chores, then keep count.
Why make the list together
A list written by one of you and put in front of the other quickly looks like a list of grievances: every line becomes “what you don’t do”. The other person gets defensive, and the conversation ends up being about the tone, not about the house at all.
Made together, the same list becomes something else entirely. Each of you adds what you do that the other didn’t see: taking the glass out to recycling, remembering to buy toilet paper before it runs out, fixing what breaks, calling the health insurance company back. The list becomes a shared inventory, and no longer one person’s opinion of the other.
- Set aside an hour, just once. A calm moment, not an evening when you’ve just argued.
- Walk through your home, then through a day. Going from room to room, then running through a typical day from getting up to going to bed, brings almost everything to the surface.
- Write everything down, even the obvious. What seems obvious to one of you is often exactly what the other doesn’t see.
- Don’t split anything yet. At this stage, you’re only listing. Who does what comes in step 5.
FairChore puts this idea to work every day: every task is worth points, and the household total always stays at zero. That's why it's meant for more than one person: create the household, then send the invitation link to the people you live with. Free, ad-free, nothing to install.
Create our household for freeThe household chores list, by room and by frequency
Here is a starting list, sorted by room or area, with the most common frequency for each task. It won’t match any household exactly: a couple without a yard will cross out the last row, a couple who rarely cooks will move tasks from one column to another. Copy it, then adapt it.
| Room or area | Every day | Every week | Every month | Less often |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Kitchen | Dishes or dishwasher, countertop, table | Stovetop and sink, floor, clearing leftovers out of the fridge | Oven and microwave, cabinet fronts | Range hood, defrosting the freezer |
| Bathroom and toilet | Airing out, tidying up | Sink, shower or bathtub, toilet bowl, mirror | Grout, hard water buildup | Clearing out expired products |
| Floors and tidying | Tidying the living areas | Vacuuming, mopping | Dusting up high, under the furniture | Windows, curtains |
| Laundry | Sorting dirty laundry | Washing, drying, folding, putting away; changing the sheets | Towels and household linens | Comforters, pillows, sorting through clothes |
| Groceries and meals | Cooking meals | Meal planning, grocery list, grocery shopping, putting groceries away | Stocking up on staples and cleaning supplies | Sorting through the pantry and freezer |
| Trash | Taking out the trash when it’s full | Sorting recycling, glass, taking the bins to the curb on pickup day | Washing the trash cans | Trips to the recycling center, bulky items |
| Paperwork | Bills to pay, appointments to book | Budget, filing | Taxes, insurance, contracts | |
| Outdoor space, if you have one | Watering in summer | Balcony or patio | Mowing, weeding | Raking leaves, trimming hedges |
Two things stand out on a second read. First, the “every day” column looks short, but it weighs the most: a daily task comes back seven times a week. Second, some rows hide another task: doing the grocery shopping means someone has made the list, and making the list means someone has checked what’s running low. That’s where the invisible tasks come in.
Invisible tasks: put them on the list
Part of household work can’t be seen, because it happens in your head: keeping track, planning, anticipating. It appears on almost no household chores list, and it’s often what makes one of you say they’re carrying everything.
- Supplies: knowing what’s about to run out before it does, and writing it down.
- Appointments: doctor, dentist, vet, contractor; booking them, remembering them, rescheduling them.
- Paperwork: spotting the deadline, filling out the form, keeping proof.
- Gifts and invitations: birthdays, holidays, thank-yous.
- Children, if you have any: sign-ups, bags to pack, permission slips to sign, clothes they’ve outgrown.
- Meal planning: deciding what you’ll eat, so the grocery shopping makes sense.
Naming them on the list makes them shareable. A task with no name stays with whoever thinks of it; a written task can change hands. “Managing the kids’ appointments” can go entirely to one of you, rather than to whoever remembers first.
This invisible work has a name, the mental load, and a whole article is devoted to it: mental load at home: 7 practical strategies to reduce it.
Give each task a value
Once the list is done, there’s a trap waiting: counting the lines. “You have twelve, I have twelve, that’s fair.” It isn’t, because not all lines are equal: taking out the trash isn’t cleaning the bathroom, and setting the table isn’t making dinner.
Before you split anything, agree on a value for each task. A simple scale is enough, for example from 1 to 5, based on three criteria:
- The time it takes, each time.
- How unpleasant it is: a dirty or heavy task, or one nobody likes, is worth more than a quick and pleasant one.
- How much it ties you down: a task that has to happen at a set time, or that can’t wait, weighs more than one you can do whenever you like.
Discuss the values once, together, and accept that they’ll be imperfect. If one of you thinks a value is unfair, you change it, but for both of you. What matters isn’t that the value is exact: it’s that the split is judged on the total of the values, rather than on the number of lines or on each person’s impression.
Split the chores, then keep count
With the list and its values, splitting the chores becomes a matter of arithmetic rather than mood. Two approaches work well for couples: dividing up whole areas of roughly equal value, all the laundry for one of you and all the meals for the other, for example, or assigning nothing and counting what each of you does. Either way, one question remains: once the list is made, who keeps it up to date? If it’s always the same person, it becomes their mental load again.
This is what FairChore makes possible. When the household is created, FairChore already suggests a list of common tasks, sorted by category, each with its value in points; whichever of you created the household can add to it, rename a task or change its value, and give the other the same right by making them an admin.
After that, each of you logs what you do. For each task, you choose the affected members. When someone does a task, its value is shared among the people concerned: whoever did it earns points, and the others concerned owe their share. The household total stays at zero. Each person’s balance accumulates from the first day: it is never reset to zero. In a couple, then, the balance tells you who owes how much to whom; in a family, it tells you by how much each person is above or below their share.
The frequency columns in your list still have their place. In FairChore’s Planner, a task can repeat every day, every week or every month, for one of you or for the whole household. On the day a scheduled task is due, FairChore sends a reminder to the person it’s assigned to, or to the whole household.
With children: their place on the list
In a family, the list doesn’t belong only to the parents. Once it’s done, pick out the tasks your children can take on for their age, and write them down under their names instead of leaving them as a vague “you could help out”.
- Little ones: putting away their toys, putting their dirty clothes in the hamper, helping set the table.
- In elementary school: setting and clearing the table, feeding a pet, tidying their room, emptying part of the dishwasher.
- In middle school: vacuuming, taking out the trash, making a simple meal with an adult.
- In high school: doing their own laundry, making a meal, running a small errand on their own.
These are guidelines, not rules: every child goes at their own pace. What matters is that a task given to a child really comes off a parent’s plate, instead of adding to it in the form of constant checking.
Get your partner on board with the list
One last point decides everything else: a list your partner has never seen doesn’t commit them to anything. If one of you makes it alone, keeps it alone and updates it alone, that person has simply put their mental load in writing. If you both made it, the split starts from the same facts, and a disagreement is about a value, which can be changed, rather than about each other’s good faith.
The same goes for the tally: it only measures the people who are in it. To bring your partner into the household, FairChore gives you an invitation link to send them. FairChore can be used in the browser, and on Android via Google Play.
To get started, go back through the steps in order: the list together, the frequencies, the invisible tasks, a value per task, then the split. Finally, set a date, a month later, to go over the list again: what you’ve been through in the meantime will show you which values to change and which tasks you had forgotten.
